A Toxic Relationship?
Relationship Signs and Signs of a Narcissist
Imagine a store owner phones a very popular customer, with an unusual request:
“Hello sir. Is this Mr. Never Satisfied? I’m the Manager of Customer Service Incorporated. And I’ve been looking at your incredible history of dissatisfactions as a customer. With all the exchanges, damaged returns, and settled lawsuits, Mr. Never Satisfied you’re actually costing us money! So I called to ask you to NOT be our customer anymore.”
Can they do that? Is this “just business?” A toxic relationship can mirror this dilemma. It’ll actually cost you if you stay with this Never Satisfied customer. Don’t bankrupt yourself. Healthy friendships and real love should always make a profit in your heart.
Can They Do That?
A toxic relationship depends on manipulation while it’s going. But when facing an actual breakup, narcissistic abuse depends on tradition (even religion) to make their target stay (not love or negotiation). The common denominator is strategy. And this type of insecurity is relentless against its target. As to the story above, the answer to “can they do that?” is an insistent yes, for the sake of your emotional health.
Is This “Just Business?”
Imagine Never Satisfied customer responding to this break up. It will always follow the same confusing rhythm, the same psychological stages of any toxic relationship (as told inside the book). From Gaslighting, to Hoovering, from a Smear Campaign, to their twisted Stonewall intentions, these are the signs of a toxic relationship. And they make up the metaphorical history of Never Satisfied.
They’ll Actually Cost You!
What can a toxic relationship do to you? How can it actually cost you, rather than benefit you as a healthy relationship does? Narcissistic people manipulate cause-and-effect so much that it ruins its target’s self-perception and self-worth. One of signs of narcissist is their eventual seniority over logic and an exhausted spouse, family member, or friend.
Undercover Customer Revenge
Harder to imagine is this Never Satisfied customer disappearing without a fight. If you already read the book, you know why. And you know what to expect. It starts with a psychological performance of the The Flying Monkeys inside the book’s riddle.
The objective of a Flying Monkey is unfortunately at all costs. These alleged peacemakers reason how to aim their approach with these realities:
Narcissists never listen. Instead they only care about winning and losing.
Targets do listen. They are sensitive to your point-of-view, even if they disagree.
So their decision is easy: approach the Target. But here’s where it gets hard: the target is rarely at fault at all (opting out is their right!). And with nothing to change about the Target, the relentless nature of the Flying Monkey becomes an unfair method: Their tricky agenda is to get the Target to listen to them as they Gaslight the Target, as mentioned in the book. And they’ll do it over-and-over again unless or until the Target recognizes that this so-called, concerned, alleged peacemaker is actually working on commission for their original pain-maker: the narcissist.
By the way, the story’s Manager of Customer Service Incorporated is you! Protect you heart at all costs. It’s “just business.”
- Jwyan C. Johnson
“The distance between U and I in Communication varies by perception”